Simba may have stolen a kiss with Choupette at the end of a moonlight walk, and Oreo may have scored by bringing her to a candle-lit hot tub, but most of the toms on The Bachelorette: Choupette remained focused on shading Buddy.
Perhaps because he’s widely viewed as a frontrunner for the affections of the cream-furred Birman, other toms hoping for her paw in marriage claimed they were not impressed by Buddy’s antics.
The silver tabby’s date with Choupette consisted of a simple meal of turkey pate, some after-dinner grooming and couch-scratching, and finally a bird-watching session, with both felines chirping away at a flock that had chosen an epic oak nearby.
“It’s almost like he’s saying ‘I don’t care about your fortune, Choupette, I’m here for you,’ which is frankly revolting,” said Loki, a four-year-old British shorthair. “Everyone knows I’m the only one who really cares about Choupette.”
Choupette, the famous companion and muse to late German fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld, is worth an estimated $13 million thanks to her inheritance.
The young season got off to a rough start last week with confusion during the rose ceremony.
“What’s this for?” contestant Tux said after Choupette gave him a rose.
“She’s sending you home, dude,” said Jasper, a handsome Maine Coon.
“Wait, I thought that was the immunity idol,” Buddy interjected.
“It’s not an immunity idol, dummy!” Jasper said. “Wrong reality show. Sheesh, don’t you watch Real Housewives?”
The cats argued about it for several minutes until an angry Choupette told them to stop their meowing, and in the end it was Oliver, a seven-year-old Chartreux, who was sent home.
“Oh yeah, well I didn’t want a stupid rose anyway!” Oliver said, belching loudly as he left the mansion.
Choupette’s next decision may have been made for her when Garfield, a ginger tabby, said the quiet part out loud in a poem he wrote about the feline heiress.
“Oh Choupette, your fur is so creamy,” Garfield recited, “your eyes are so blue, and your fortune is so dreamy. Our mansion will have scratchers on every…”
“Stop!” Choupette said, turning to the producers. “Send him home!”
“Was it something I said?” Garfield called over his shoulder as two burly tigers hauled him away. “Choupette, my love! Don’t do this!”
via Pain In The Bud