Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree, I am going to destroy you!
Oh Christmas tree, oh Big Buddy, I am going to annoy you!
Got yummies in my bowl to taste, and ornaments and lights to break
Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree, I am going to destroy you!
Your branches point so high and straight
Just begging for a swipe to take
Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree
I will annihilate you!
Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree, how lovely are your branches?
Oh Christmas tree, oh Big Buddy, I am going to faceplant it!
The Hallmarks will shatter and break, I’ll make disaster of this place
Oh Christmas tree, oh Big Buddy, I am going to annoy you!
You sparkle like the morning dew
Look mangled when I’m done with you
Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree
What fun it is to wreck stuff!
Buddy’s Favorite Things
Temps in my bowlses and snacks in the kitchen
Taunting the street cats and smacking some kittens
Leaving the neighbor’s dog tied up in strings
These are a few of my favorite things!
Bubble wrap, peanuts and UPS boxes
4 a.m. zooms when I scream like a rocket
Waking my human with songs that I sing
These are a few of my favorite things!
At nail clip time, things I dislike
When I’m really mad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don’t feel so bad!
Calico booties and slices of Gouda
Ambushing like I’ve been launched by bazooka
No consequences ’cause I am the king
These are a few of my favorite things!
Screeching in anguish at doors closed between us
Shattering Wise Men and statues of Jesus
I helped myself to the buffalo wings
These are a few of my favorite things!
Meow at my bowl as if I’ve been forgotten
Screeching in panic ’cause I see the bottom
Gorging on kibble till I am puking
These are a few of my favorite things!
When I’m told no, ’cause I broke those
When my dad is mad
I’ll get away with my favorite things
Because I’m a real cute cat!
It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas
It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas
Everywhere I look
Take a look at the Christmas tree, it’s been redesigned by me
And the lights are broken!
It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas
Coal in every sock
It’s beginning to look a bit like I’ve had too much catnip
And now I’m dizzy!
A Santa Claws surprise and a Roomba for me to ride
Is the wish of Buddy the Cat
A box to take a nap and another to take a crap
What do you think of that?
And my human can hardly wait for vacation!
It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas
With every wrap I shred
Now it’s nap time for me, underneath the Christmas tree
Then I’ll demand treats!
Twelve Days of Christmas
On the first day of Christmas
My human gave to me
A can of delicious turkey
On the second day of Christmas
My human gave to me
Two window perches
And a can of delicious turkey
On the third day of Christmas
My human gave to me
Three cozy boxes
Two window perches
And a can of delicious turkey
On the fourth day of Christmas
My human gave to me
Four kneading blankets
Three cozy boxes
Two window perches
And a can of delicious turkey
On the fifth day of Christmas
My human gave to me
Five golden bowls
Four kneading blankets
Three cozy boxes
Two window perches
And a can of delicious turkey
On the sixth day of Christmas
My human gave to me
Six Chewy orders
Five golden bowls
Four kneading blankets
Three cozy boxes
Two window perches
And a can of delicious turkey
On the seventh…zzzz…
…zzzz…
Hey, Bud?
…zzz…turkeh…zzzz…
Bud!
…zzz…
Well, it looks like the catnip and tryptophan have done their thing and the little guy is asleep, dreaming of turkey and presents. Don’t worry, he’ll be singing these songs for five more days. Five more days?!?! Ugh…
via Pain In The Bud